Let Me Just Say

How freaking cute is this.



Booger says, "Mommy, I is hiding"

I went for my run last night, did about 3 miles at 4.5 miles an hour, good jog, felt awesome. I'm not even all that tired today, I think I am at the point (which I was convinced people were lying about) where exercise really does energize me. Apparently my gym has two 24 hour locations and on Sunday nights there aren't a lot of people (read: teenage dudes running 8 miles an hour, like, forever) so I feel a little less overwhelmed.

The plan moving forward is that on Sundays, from now until May, I am going to try to do the 6.2 miles at the gym. If I have to walk most of it, that's not an issue. I figure if it becomes part of my week, then on May 7th it will be easier. So Sunday (walk/jog), Monday (Piyo/Drills), Wednesday(elliptical/strength) and Saturday(Zumba) are my gym days.

The next few days are going to be hard food wise, early mornings and stupid busy days are going to be challenging with staying on the plan. I have chosen days with cold lunches and hopefully all will go well.  The first week of the month is always a bit of a hard time for me, my monthly caseload monitoring has to be done and it sooooo tedious. blech.

I have offered to be the DD at the Mardi Gras parade this weekend, I believe this will help me focus on the plan, and provide a safe way home to my girls. Plus, I don't want a booze bloat to screw up my weigh in next week. I made some really cool crafty sunglasses for all the folks I'm going with. It's my Mud run teammate's birthday so we are all going to hang at the parade together.

Mud Run Registration

Hey Folks,
just a quick post to mention my Mud run again. I have registered and there is no going back. If you'd like to read about what I've signed up for you can go here to learn more. My family paid my non-refundable registration fee and I'm not going to let them down. If you wish to help me fund-raise the insanity follow the link below, which will also be on the side bar of the blog until the run in May.
Ninja's MS Mud Run Donation Page
I'll keep you updated on the training, as for today I'm going for a short jog, going to try to do 4 miles in an hour. which I can typically do at a slow jog, fast walk. Then tomorrow is another 2 hour PiYo/Drills marathon. I'm going to do this, I'm going to be a runner and I'm going to lose these 23 pounds, maybe not before the run, but for me it's enough to be on the right track.

At the point, coherent is really...

not an option. No great diet insights today, food was good, and water was were it should be. I did an early workout, and then was moving all day.

So I spent the day making this for my mud run "you call it" bake sale. Turned out pretty cute.





And here are the girls new hair cuts.

(wow my kitchen is such a mess!)

(yes, those are girl scout cookies behind Booger, you will be happy to know I did not eat them, the munches did)

Don't have much else to add, it's been a long, long day. I got about 5 hours of workout in this week, and after the chili cook-off at church tomorrow I am going for a run and then in to work for a few hours, it's going to be another one of those weeks, I can tell...

I. Was. Running.

So, I jogged/ran for 2.5 miles. I varied between 3.8 and 5.6 miles per hour and was on the treadmill for about 40 minutes(including a warm up and cool down) I figured I would feel self conscious, running in front of other people (a recurring high school nightmare) makes me nervous. But everyone else was just doing their own hamster impression and were way too busy to pay attention to my fast ass. Today I am taking the munches with me to the gym, because they have free childcare. I plan on doing 45 minutes on the elliptical and 30 minutes of weights and stuff. Then I'm going to just do a long walk tomorrow and on Saturday I'll be back at Zumba at 8 am. I'll probably run again on Sunday, I'll increase the number of times I run and the distance, I'll try for 2.75 miles.

The only issue with the run was, well, the twins. I had forgotten my workout underwear and ended up running wearing my regular daytime skivvies. The bouncing was epic and the tenderness today is quite disturbing. But at least when I was running my butt wasn't wiggling as much as it did during turbo kick or drills. My cousin suggested spanx, and while I probably won't buy those I am considering some compression pants. I read on a few other blogs that they are helpful, so we'll see.

I decided that, since I am very forgetful, I was not going to let forgetting things keep me from going to the gym.  I have worked out without shoes, without socks, in a button up shirt, and now sans sports bra. I tend to think I will start remembering when I make myslef do it no matter how uncomfortable it might be.

Last night I had Mutti cut the girl's hair, both of my girls have beautiful curls that are a serious pain in the ass. The problem is they both *hate* having their hair brushed. The crying is not fun and no amount of de-tangler makes it much easier on them. Also they won't wear hair accessories, no headbands, hair ties, barrettes, or clips. Their hair just hangs and tangles and looks awful. So until they get older (and can brush their own hair) they are going to have shorter hair. Both hair cuts turned out super cute and I'll probably post some photos tomorrow.

Like Butter

I had a meltdown last night. I was sad, I don't know why.
I still am a little sad today, still don't know why.

Pre life change, feeling sad meant I would toss a half box of elbow macaroni and a few chicken bullion cubes in a pot and then pour parmesan cheese over the pseudo-soup and chow down for hours while reading a romance novel (but skipping to the good parts, wink)

Well, last night I decided that since I'm trying to change, and also since there was no macaroni in my house that I would just feel what I was feeling and figure out something else. (I'm not so sure that I would have been strong if there had been pasta in the house, not buying it has been an intentional choice and apparently a good one) I was down and sad, but not hopeless or feeling useless. So I decided to try some different things I've always been too full of elbow noodles to do. I cleaned up the girl's room, I did a 10 minute biggest loser workout, I read some blogs, I re-arranged my closet, I sat and cried for awhile, and then I went to Jeeves and told him I needed him.

He held me and let me cry and listened when I tried to talk about it. I know I didn't make sense, but when I was done and exhausted, he brought me a big glass of ice water and told me he would put the munches to bed and I could go to sleep if I wanted to. I did want to, so I did. I felt supported and loved and cared for. Much better than full and ashamed.

Today I feel better, maybe I was mostly just stressed and tired. I'm a mother of two with a full time job and a husband who has not worked since the beginning of the year. Stress is just part of the deal, I gotta take the occasional bad with the multitudes of good. This morning I found both of my little ones had crawled into bed with me and were snuggled up with me. They were warm, one on each side, tucked under my arm with their little curly heads nuzzled into me and they smelled like Johnson's baby lotion. I stayed there for an hour snuggling my babies and kissing their sleepy little faces.
Then I cried some more, happy, mommy crying (you know what I'm talking about) because I am so very blessed.

I'll take feeling cared for, loved and blessed over the post-sad-fat-soup bloat any day

Wiggly Bad Ass

I may have mentioned that I joined a gym. I decided that I needed to have more options for group exercise, and the ability to use a childcare service when Jeeves goes back to work. (which will hopefully be soon) So club fitness became my new workout place, I still have access to the elliptical at work and the private space to look a fool when doing pushups and crunches, but I've been trying out some new group exercise classes and have found a few that are going to be weekly routine for me. Group classes are good for me, I have this huge fear of looking foolish in front of others so I don't let myself slack in the classes. I push harder and then feel really good afterwards.

Saturday 8AM Zumba: this class is less crowded and also very convenient for me. Nothing is really happening at this time of day and the munches are typically still asleep when I leave. I wake up around 6:30 most mornings before my alarm goes off at 7, so last week I went to the gym and jogged and then did Zumba. It felt good and I got the workout done before anything else needed my attention.

Monday 5PM PiYo: This is a fusion of Yoga and Pilates with weights. it's a 45 minute class that is very challenging but also centers me. It's done in a darkened room, with light music and lots of breathing and stretching. I did it last night and feel remarkable today. I have never done a yoga class before, and this was an great introduction.

Monday 5:45PM: Drills: The full title of this class is "drills to make you sweat." It's 4 minutes of Turbo Kick (sorta) followed by 4 minutes of muscle drills.  It's an awesome way to train for this 10K mud run I'm doing, and even though I felt all wiggly and weak when I left last night, I am certain I am going to do this class a lot. One problem, my ass wiggles a lot more than I like it to when doing this class, so I think more squats are in order.

I was at the gym for 2 hours last night, I left feeling pretty bad ass, like I could take on the world. When I got home, I worked on my house, played with my babies and went to sleep. It was a good day, a really good day.

I hope you are all having a good day too.

What a Weekend

I haven't posted for a bit, and I apologize about that. I've been very, very busy. I mentioned that it was my mother's 50th birthday last week. I planned a surprise party, which went off very well. I also went to the gym several times since I last posted including two zumba classes and a 5 mile jog on the treadmill.

I am feeling pretty great activity wise, but have been sleeping poorly for about the last week. I got to sleep about 11 hours last night which was lovely, but my little one's are having some sleep disturbances, and it's causing night time turmoil. when I don't sleep well, I don't lose well, so I am going to institute some new bedtime routines for the munches to see if it will help them to snooze more peacefully.

On Thursday of last week, post jog at the gym I went to walmart to buy groceries. I didn't look awesome, but you've seen the websites, sometimes people look less than awesome at Walmart, and I had a pretty good excuse. So I get my groceries, and head out to my car only to realize I have locked my keys in the car. Jebus. I look around and see a Chevy's within walking distance, not wanting to wait outside until Mutti could come get me in an hour I hotfooted it over and took a seat in the empty bar with my 6 giant walmart bags full of crap. The bartender walked over and asked if I needed anything. I said, "I'm having the worst afternoon, tell me it's happy hour" it was and a beer and some tortilla chips later, I was feeling immeasurably better. Allan gave me hard time, just a little, and I probably deserved it, but right then, for me it was an okay decision, and I still lost a pound this week.

24 pounds to go till I get to my new goal of 155 pounds. I'm hoping with all the training for the 10K mud run, it'll start coming off really fast.

I'll be around, commenting on blogs today, seeing what everyone is up to, drinking water, being hungry, alright, alright, I'm going now...

Turbo Kick

Kicked my ass! No joke. I didn't have that hard of a time keeping up, but seriously the instructor was like the energizer bunny on crack. It was very fast paced, and at the end of it I felt like I could probably do it again, if I had to. LOL.  But I may look around at other classes, that one was really crowded, I was worried I was going to turbo kick my neighbor!

I think I did something incorrectly because the muscles on the left side of my back are very very sore. Bad body alignment or something, but I'm going to see the Chiro dude if it doesn't loosen in a day or too.

Yesterday was my Mutti's 50th birthday and in the last 7 months she has lost 50 pounds. She is so amazing and we did a bunch of fun things, happy hour, dinner out, cake, It was super fun and she had a great time.

Another busy day today, I'm going to get to work so I can go to the gym and be home in enough time to take my munches out to play, it's going to be so nice this afternoon. I am loving this weather!

The Rodent that Wasn't

Not much new on the diet front, still pluggin along, Going to the gym tonight, for a turbo kick class, then some running on the treadmill. Gonna see if I can do it, I bet I can.

Jeeves tried to convince me to buy the munches a hamster last night. I said no, not because I am opposed to rodents, quite the contrary I would love to own one, however, Booger and Pumpkin are tiny evil geniuses and I can imagine this happening...
Pumpkin: Mommy?
Ninja: Yes dear, what do you need?
Pumpkin: Where's the Hamster?
Ninja: In the cage, baby.
Pumpkin: No, Booger opened the door. Now the hamster ran away.
Ninja: WHAT!!!
Pumpkin: Yeah, he runs really fast, and he spilled water on the floor (actually peed on the floor)
Ninja: What! What!!!
The conclusion of the story no doubt finds me carefully cutting the lining off the couch to retrieve the dead hamster who made a nest and then ate one too many mini m&m's and stroked out.

Happy Tuesday All.
Ninja

Happy Monday!

So, I posted last week about the MS society Mud Run that I am going to be taking part in. I was out this weekend with my mother's family and was telling them about my Bake Sale idea and sort of asking them to think about contributing. Well, during one lunch I raised 55 dollars. My family rocks! I am going to bake some nice things for them to say thank you, but they didn't even tell me what they want so I'll have to guess. Apparently when I register, there will be a web page set up to take donations online, which is pretty cool too. I will link it here when it gets set up, so if anyone is interested in donating a dollar or two they will be able to.

I'm not doing anything terribly romantic tonight. We don't have sitter so Jeeves, Pumpkin, Booger (who is still sickly) and I will be eating dinner together and then finding a movie to watch on netflix. The munches were awake when I left for work this morning, so they should be nice and sleepy around 10. This will give Jeeves and I some time to...well...maybe we'll clean out the spare room, or play Farkle, hehehehehe, just kidding.

I had a hell of a weekend. Friday night I did Zumba class, then got up Saturday Morning and did another one. Saturday afternoon I went to the 1st birthday party of my youngest nephew. There was cake, but I only had a few bites. Saturday evening I went to a friend's birthday party which was awesome. We played Demolition Ball, which is like a mix of bumper cars, whiffle ball, hockey and lacrosse. It's super fun, but rough on your body. The list of things that still hurt today is so long that I'd do better to tell you that the webs of the toes on my left foot and my right nostril are the only parts of body not in pain.

Yesterday we went to lunch at Fast Eddies's Bon Air. It's a Saint Louis institution, even though it's in Alton Illinois. My family goes there a few times a year, typically for some one's birthday and always for their 21st birthday. It's a tradition. I was there on my 21st birthday, it wasa blast. As the first grandchild I was the first to turn 21 and the whole family delighted in attempting to get me knackered. They have food for insanely cheap prices and it's all good, brats and fries for 99 cents, Pork and Steak Kabobs that taste like heaven and the coldest beer in town.

It was a good, busy weekend.

Happy V-Day Everyone, I hope you have a wonderful romantic evening, if that's your style.
If It's not, well, then I hope you don't get rope burns from being tied to the bed, lol

What Do You Think?

I got up early because Booger woke up at 5am with a 102 fever. We got it down and she's happily ensconced on the couch with a sippy cup full of crystal light and a granola bar now. Since I was up, and needed to stay up to monitor Booger,  I decided to color my hair

What do you think? It's only a slight difference, but I like it.

Well, I'm off the gym for my second Zumba class, I went to one last night as well. I'm joining the gym today so I can begin training in earnest for my 10K run in May, So I'll let you know how everything goes. There's a few locations with classes that work into my schedule, so it should be pretty great.

*shudder* I'm going to workout where other people can see me, pray for me.

Best Wake Up Ever

So this morning I rolled out of my warm bed, did my potty thing and shed my artic jammies to weigh in. Usually I just sort of glare at the scale and think hateful thoughts. Today I wanted to kiss the white hunk of metal. Because she gave me a gift.


180 pounds!!!! This means I can purchase my next incentive, a stand mixer! Which is awesome because I am going to participate in the MS Mud Run in May.

My readers probably know that I started this journey in May of last year, See here I was 232 pounds and needed to make some changes. So this May, I am hoping to be close to my 160 goal and be in excellent shape so I can run a 10K with military style obstacles. I have committed myself to doing it and will be registering next week when our tax money comes back.  I have decided to join a team called Muck You with a new friend who is wonderfully supportive and have asked my little bro to consider doing it as well.

The reason my stand mixer is going to help with this, (I know you were probably confused) is that to fund raise the 100.00 minimum donation I am going to be hosting a "10.00 You Call It Bake Sale" Anyone who donates 10.00 to my Team for this race will be able to choose a delicious baked good made by me. A pan of brownies, batch of cookies or decorated cake for instance. I'm hoping this goes over well because I  -love- to bake and this will let me bake, give the goodies away, not gain weight from baked goods, raise money for charity, and take part in this immense and exciting challenge. (I hope lots of people want decorated cakes or cupcakes because I want to make my homemade butter cream in my new mixer)

Do you think my bake sale is a good idea? I figured I could just ask for cash but this way I'm giving them something for their money, and it's delicious. Everybody wins.

What Time Is It?

Jeeves and I had a talk about getting healthy the other day. He has changed his job and is in the middle of trying to start his own business. He is a smart guy but 4 years of working the midnight shift followed by watching babies all day had turned him into a zombie. He ate to stay awake and since sweets cause the instant sugar rush that was what he reached for when tired took over.

I approached him recently about getting healthier, and possibly going on my diet, doing Allan's challenge, working out with me...something. He said, "it's just not a good time, I have a lot of stress these days and I don't want to add more too it."

That made me think...

When is it a good time.

When in your life have you looked at the shit you have to deal with and though, "Yes! this is a good day to be on a diet."

When in your life do you think, "I really don't have much stress to deal with, lets add some more in"?

It doesn't happen. there is no perfect starting point, no amazing day in the imaginary someday that will be picture perfect for working out and will produce instant weight loss.

Today, is the day. 

If you want to lose weight, if you want to change your life, right now is the time. Decide this minute, not tomorrow, not Monday, not next month.

Now, right now. Every minute is the first minute of the rest of your life. Everyday is a chance to start over and make better choices.

Yesterday is gone and ghosts aren't real, so don't let dietary indescretions haunt you. Every decision you make is a chance to make a positive change in your life.

So, What Time is it?

It's 2:57
It's time to go to the gym.
And it's time to change your life.
Right now.

Fat, Lazy and Safe

Jeeves and I went out last night to the local comedy club for open-mike night. I love open mike night, it's like watching 5 year olds play t-ball. (which, by the way, is the funniest shit evar) There was this comedian who talked about kids and said he was going to give his kids all the food they could eat because fat kids are harder to kidnap. He was talking about people on the news and how their kids are the sexy skinny kids out there playing soccer and running. He said his kids were going to have dortios and XBOX, they are going to be fat, lazy and safe. It made me laugh so hard that my tonic with lime almost came out of my nose.

There is a 2 drink minimum at the bar so I had no-cal tonic with lime. Looked like a drink but non of the calories of booze, nor the water retention factor. yipee. I'm still feeling puffy today so I may take a water pill. I got the okay from the doc since my hormones are being spiteful to take one a day when I'm feeling super puffy, I just have to drink "at least 6-8 glasses of water a day"...like that's an issue. Gimmie a break here, I'm drinking so much damn water I feel like I'm trying to get into the Guinness book

I found out that the ultrasound is going to cost almost 200.00 so I've had to postpone it until we get our taxes done. I don't have that kind of out of pocket cash. Also I think perhaps I can get them to bill me; that way I can use my FSA money. Good thing too, I always do the FSA and almost never use all the cash I pay in.  Let me just tell you how crushed I am that I don't get to go in and have some stranger perform an invasive test on me. An invasive (embarrassing) test which will probably not give me anymore information than I already have.

Going to the gym today with high hopes for an great workout. I've been feeling pretty sluggish and working alot of hours so I'm hoping the workout today will give me some endorphins and help me feel a little more alert. (The world needs more lerts.) I'm holding out hope that the temperature elevation slated for the end of the week happens, if it does I am going to take a few hours off work and go for my very first outside three mile jog.

I am committed to becoming a runner. I want to do charity runs, marathons and who knows, maybe more. I have a group of new (and awesome) friends who run and do charity stuff and I want so badly to do it with them. I think I am holding myself back because I'm terrified of running in public. I had exercise induced asthma as a child and never had to run in gym class. So running isn't exactly natural to me, but I love the exhilaration that comes from the cardio I do indoors, I bet outdoors is better. I need to get over being a big giant baby self conscious and just get out there.

C25K here I come.

More Lady Bits

I had to go back to the Dr. today as I have had three (5-6 day long) cycles in the last 6 weeks and was starting to worry that I had something really wrong with me. After another pelvic exam (yipee) and another round of blood work (ouch) I still have no clue why my uterus has gone funky. I have an appointment to get an internal ultrasound later this week, (can you hear the joy in my voice...no... well you're just not listening hard enough) Word to the wise ladies, don't mess with the reproductive system. You piss of your lady bits and they will bring the hurt.

Doc said that there's a good chance I have some hormone-y unbalance and prescribed a multivitamin with iron because I'm too Irish to lose that much blood and not become anemic. She also said there's a good chance nothing will be wrong and since I went to the doctor instead of freaking out, it'll solve itself and never happen again.(What the french!). She felt a small mass on one ovary which will be worked out with the ultrasound. she said it's probably nothing, and I'm doing good on the wieght loss. It's been 8 weeks since I last saw her and the scale in her office says I've lost 10 pounds since then.

P.S. the scale at my ObiWan office is a lying snot, but I'm not going to sink to her level. I asked and the doc says it weighs really heavy, about 8 pounds heavier than home scales. To me, that suggests it's time to get that shit looked at, cause I think making uncomfortable women feel worse than they already do, well, that just sucks.

yeah, this basically describes my day.

Oh Baby, You Know What I Like!

I work in Human Services, and that means that fundraising is needed to pay my salary, so I volunteered at our annual charity dinner. The theme this years was rocking 50's so I had my uber-awesome SIL from Vavoom Vintage help me work out this stunning ensemble. She did my hair and gave me these cute little cherries to put in my hair too. She also loaned me a petticoat thing that helped to fill out the skirt. I sold raffle tickets and served as some living decoration for the evening. It was very fun and I scored a huge piece of chocolate cake for my efforts in the "craft service room" during my break. I'd have taken a photo, but I inhaled it too fast.

Heading out with the fam tomorrow for a ladies day while the dudes watch the super bowl. Hope your team wins, and if they don't I hope you don't get indigestion from too many hot wings.

Ladies and Gentlemen...

I give you...

Ninja in brand new, Size 12 pants!!!!! 
ZOMG! ZOMG! ZOMG!
(please excuse the awful photo, Jeeves was being a turd about helping me with pictures and insisted he could take adequate photos while lying down on the couch and holding the camera in the air, weirdo)

Now, I had set a goal for myself to be able to wear size twelve by Valentine's day and it appears I have met that goal. I bought these pants today before trying them on, from Target. Merona is a brand that I usually have some trouble with. When I wear a 14 in other brands, Merona says I'm a 16. I bought these because I figured they would be too tight and I would have some good GOAL pants, however these are my new, super-hot, really-nice-ass, if-zombies-rise-I-have-enough-awesome-pockets-for-my-bullets, pants.

But that's not the best part...

You ready for this...

They were only 7 dollars!!! 75% off clearance rack!!!
(I'm basking in the rosy glow of a prolonged sale-gasm)

Over The Hill

I weighed in this morning to surprising results.

182.

I have lost 50 pounds, I have 22 pounds left to lose before I hit my goal of 160 pounds. 160 is still about 6 pounds higher than the highest BMI in my normal range. But I've been 160 before, and I looked good, and if this is about me then I feel like I should be the one to decide when I'm done losing weight and what feels right for me.

I did the long workout last night, 1 hour in the gym with the biggest loser exercises and a few others, and 30 minutes of 3/1 intervals in the elliptical. Today I am sore but I have more energy and clarity of mind that makes me feel much better.  I know the real pain is coming, I can feel it in my arms and lower abs. But I feel the burn and that makes it pain for a reason.

I looked in the mirror today and was surprised by how much thinner my midsection looks than it used to. Before stepping on that scale last May, I used to stand in the mirror and suck in my stomach and fool myself that I really didn't look as big as the pictures said I did. I would do my hair real nice and wear flowing black clothes and think, sure, I'm overweight, but I'm not that big. I was a size 20 in February of last year. 232 pounds and getting bigger. I was that big.

I was that big, but not now, and not again. 

Burritos and Hats

I ate a burrito for breakfast this morning. It was not a breakfast burrito, it had Frito's in it. Now I sort of want to go purge, It is just sitting in my stomach and sending me telepathic messages about the agony it is going to cause me later. It was 510 calories, sweet Jesus, 510???? Anyway, I'm having a 200 calorie salad for lunch and a 300 calorie dinner (3 ounces of chicken and 2 cups of steamed broccoli normandy flavored with salad spritzer), and I'll have two protein bars one with lunch and one post workout, so I'll stay under 1500 calories. The day will be salvageable as I am also going to the gym for an hour this afternoon.

Yesterday I went out in the blizzard and gave myself a migraine while driving which is hitting full force today. I'm sitting at my desk wearing sunglasses and all the lights are off. Light makes me nauseous when the headache is at it's zenith. Hopefully the workout and then a rest tonight will push it off. (Ahh Endorphins, the poor man's Ecstasy)

After I got home I sat on the couch while Jeeves watched a movie and made a hat. It's a little pastel to be truly a hippie hat, but the style and slouch are about right. It worked up really fast and I've already made two others, the munches each wanted one, even though they already have more hats than any toddlers ought to. That beautiful necklace I'm wearing was my most treasured gift from Jeeves and the Munches at Christmas, it has the munches names engraved on it. I had to get a new chain for it though, because I have a thing about short necklaces, they are an affront to one of the gods, I'm sure of it.

(dear god, I have a big nose!)
So I'm building stock to have a booth at a flea market this summer, would you pay 5.00 for this hat if you were in the market for hat?