Pink Eye, Ear Infections, And Dick Face Doctors

So, I have been MIA for the last little while, for good reason, my life has been a roller-coaster merry-go-round of shit and sick and girl scouts and work BS.

My oldest started complaining that her eye hurt at a birthday party on the 6th, then a few hours later she had definite zombie eye and I called our friendly neighborhood hippie doctor, who was not in, so I spoke to her associate. He was a nice dude and called in a prescription. Which was filled at one of the two 24 hour pharmacies in our area WHICH DOES NOT ACCEPT OUR INSURANCE!!!!

So we went next door to the OTHER 24 hour pharmacy which shares a parking lot with the first and they did take our insurance but it took 45 minutes to get the script sent across 20 feet of asphalt and I ended up with three kids at the pharmacy until the wee hours. Fast forward a week.

Pumpkin begins complaining of ear pain and whacking herself in the side of the head. So I take the other two to Mutti's house and carry my semi conscious pumpkin into Urgent care. She has an ear infection, Yay! So after another trip to the pharmacy and paying for two more prescriptions, we go home and try to get everyone into bed because Mommy is tired.

This week is our Accreditation survey at work so the office has been a mad house and I've been elbow deep in paperwork and compliance issues.

Meanwhile Doodle starts a runny nose and begin leaving snail trails all over the house and adorable (read"oh my god! Disgusting!") snot hand prints on the laminate floor. Then Sunshine wakes up crying with a sore throat and at 2 PM yesterday I get a call from Jeeves. "Hey Ninja, Doodle has pink eye now and is still snotting like his brain a struck a leak, can we give him Pumpkin's leftover eye drops?"


So I leave work early to take the tiny broken one to an emergency appointment at the doctors office. (Background: Doodle has not had a clear bill of health since October, Dude has ear issues, and they are persistent.) SO... Doc Hippie starts telling me about how I shouldn't give him Tylenol because he will develop asthma and that "most moms" think their baby has an ear infection and it's just a cold...yada-yada-yada. (The subtext here: "you probably brought this kid in for nothing, bad momma, stupid momma, hypochondriac-momma...")

Then she looks at his eye, which now looks like he's been in a prize fight, and takes a look in the ears and then looks at the chart and says, "Oh, he's been ill for quite a while, antibiotics, and you should take him to see an ENT so we can get this cleared up."

My Internal Dialogue  Woman, I KNOW when my kids are sick and I would not put up with your condescending bullshit if I didn't think this kid needed something to help him feel better. If you give me one more bit of lip, I might kick you in the taco. Come on, give me a reason to hurt you.

So, she's typing up the visit notes and referral to the ENT and I say, "I really want him to start feeling better, he's such a happy little guy, I hate to see him feeling so yucky"

And no shit she says to me, "Well, you shouldn't be so upset, your child didn't just get transferred to the hospital via ambulance today, did he?" Suggesting that my concern for my child is not okay and I should just shut up because someone else's child had to go to the hospital.

I was fuming, what an asshole! My kids are legitimately sick and I am being a good and responsible mother, and while I am sorry that another child had to go to the ER; my child is my focus and the severity of his condition in relation to another child means nothing to me when I am trying to care for MY FAMILY...

deep breaths


Happy Birthday Sunshine Girl!

Five years ago today, I woke up in the middle of the night in labor with Sunshine, she came fast; with a few pushes and a big snort! Since then she has been a spinning, dancing, singing whirlwind with blond curls and blue eyes and the boniest knees I've ever seen. She makes up words and tries like hell to get everyone to laugh along with her when she is in a good mood. She is a beautiful little girl, though being 4 has been a bit trying for her emotionally. There is a lot of crying and whining and "It's not fair!!!" at our house these days. She is hilarious and often asks questions like, "Mommy why is blue?" or "Mommy why should kids never jump up and down and hold dogs?" (wait, what?)

For her birthday this year, she wants a Pizza Birthday. Pizza Street has a party room, arcade and face painting/balloon artist on Tuesdays, so tonight her party is going to include her favorite "spot pizza," cake, ice cream, soda, video games and a balloon hat. In lieu of party favors we are going to give each kid about 3.00 in game tokens and let them play until they are gone. The restaurant has soft serve ice cream on the buffet, so we will probably make some cupcakes to take along. Maybe I'll even get industrious and make pizza themed cupcakes, we'll see.

I bought her a new dress and some shoes and we are getting her a "big girl" bed for her birthday. Then this summer I am working on a quilt with her name on it for her new bed. Since I'm doing one for each girl, I'll probably finish them in time for Christmas gifts. Apart from a bed and new clothes, she is getting a new booster seat for the car, probably a toy and some preschool books that she can practice numbers and letters with, which will undoubtedly be her favorite thing because she wants so badly to go to school. In fact turning five is not nearly as exciting as when it will be "Reaggie School Time" as she calls it.

I'll post a bunch of photos tomorrow so you can see our pizza celebration!


I Have a Body by Baby

Today my temporary baby storage facility is being featured on one of my very favorite blogs. The Beer Bitch is my hero and she makes me smile and having my bod and some of my story featured on her blog is the shit. If you have a free moment and want to take a look, leave a comment, laugh hysterically at my crazy inch long stretch mark that didn't get the "below the belt" memo....here is the link


Hope everyone is having a good Monday  it's a little shitsville around here today, but I'm sure the massive amounts of carbs I'm about to consume in the form of a cheese coated bagel are going to turn that all around.

Or make me need a mid-mid-morning nap even more.


Baby Love #2: Sunshine Girl

It's no secret that I'm a momma. I love my babies to pieces and in the great hush before the storm that having 4 kids will undoubtedly be, I'm feeling nostalgic, and emotional and in love with my babies (well okay, my baby and two Big Girls, they hate it when I call them my babies.)

I find my self spending great amounts of time just being with them, soaking up all of them, the things that make them, them.

My Sunshine Girl: My 2nd Baby
Reagan 2-12
When I started this blog, my younger daughter had the nickname Booger. I called her Booger-butt from the time she was born. I've also called her Rotabega, Reaggi-Roo, and now I call her my Sunshine girl

She was born in 2008 with a great big snort. She hadn't even fully cleared the hatch yet when she had us all giggling because of the great big snort. She is such an energetic little thing and lord is she tiny, so skinny that i have to alter every pair of pants I buy because they just slide right off her tiny little tush.

She loves rainbows and for the longest time she had never seen a real one in the sky, so I made her a crocheted rainbow blanket while I was pregnant with her brother and in the last year it has become one of her most prized possessions. When someone is sick or cold she will sometimes offer it to comfort them, and she wraps up in it each night like it will keep all the bad things away.
Boy can she talk! Sometimes her brain gets ahead of her ability to make words come out and she gets caught on skip, saying the same words over and over again. As soon as someone she hasn't seen in a while comes into the house she pounces, telling them all about the three special steps to saying prayers, and how to dance like a princess and how after the summer it's time for her to go to school but she wants to take bananas and apples for lunch every day because she wants to be healthy. Occasionally she talks so much we have to beg for a few minutes of quiet because she just keeps going, rapid fire, like if she pauses the world might stop turning.

Occasionally she will still crawl her bony little body into my lap and fall asleep and those moments are ever so precious, her warm little limbs all curled around me reminds me of the tiny snorting little thing I brought home five years ago.

She's almost 5, so Happy Early Birthday Sunshine Girl!
You'll never know dear, how much I love you.


Um?...Big Ass?

So yesterday, post Easter church and festivities; Mutti, Jeeves and I took the munches to a local playground because it was beautiful outside and everyone needed some fresh air. Doodle crawled around and tried to eat mulch, Sunshine ran around, holding her pants up with one hand, and Pumpkin climbed to the top of everything. It was awesome, I took pictures,







I love my babies.

Okay, so at one point my mother mistakenly took a short video of me walking away from her. I was wearing a skirt and flip flops, and my ass looks enormous. Sweet merciful heavens, I have not been paying attention. and while I was busy being bitchy pregnant and loving on my babies I have developed a really, really large ass. It's time for Plan P, the pregnancy plan. I don't know what it is yet, but as soon as I figure it out, I'll let you know.

Hi, My name is Nellie (I am a Ninja), and I have a big ass. I've been sour patch and ice cream free for 24 hours, and I am getting ready to eat a salad for lunch. I can create a smaller ass while growing a tiny human, and hopefully, whatever it might look like, Plan P will help.
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