Can't Trust That Day

Sometimes, you have to name your blog post after an obscure second line of an oldie's lyric.


So, it's Monday  I didn't watch the Oscars  and I really couldn't care less who won or what they wore. I spent the weekend in faded glory and GEORGE by Walmart, along with baby drool, snot and some cookie crumbs.

Like I said, living the dream.

I went out Friday night, to a fish fry, with Erin. We took the girls and ate until we thought we might explode and then we came back to my house and watched LOTR until almost midnight. But for real, it was awesome. The fish fry we went to was hosted by a local baptist church, which seems incongruous, but is in fact the best fish fry I've ever been to thanks to two facts.
1: It's all you can eat for under 10.00 for an adult.
2: They serve the best food I've ever had at a fish fry. The 4 different choices of fish are well cooked and not greasy, and the sides go for miles, mac and cheese, green beans, french fries, hush puppies, fried shrimp, onion rings, spaghetti...seriously and there is dessert and iced tea/lemonade/water included in the price.

Apart from that I'm just tired, even though I slept from 10 last night until 8 this morning, go figure. It's a much guarded fact of adulthood that you spend 98% of your life after 21 at least sort of tired. I think that other 2% is the few days when you might actually sleep well due do a cold medication induced semi-coma. I think we hide it from the teenagers so they won't decide to sterilize themselves to avoid turning into one of the shuffling, moaning zombies that seem to make up a great deal of the 28-40 crowd.  



Yesterday our little corner of the mid-west got a fair sized dumping of frozen white stuff. The ninja family stayed inside, out of cold and weathered the storm in our pajamas. It was Pumpkin's first official snow day, I sort of wanted to write about it in her baby book. *nostalgia*

School was out today too so I slept in, and came in late to the office. It was nice, except for the whole tromping through the snow, having to use an ancient broom to clean off the car and freezing my butt off.

Yesterday I made food to sustain us through the snowstorm. I made a pot of spaghetti noodles, mixed in butter, Parmesan cheese and garlic and then cooked some chicken breasts with marinara sauce. It was like something you'd eat at Olive Garden, so remarkably good. I ate too much and am still paying for it. It seems like my stomach is getting less tolerant of being over full. If I eat several small meals through the day I feel great. but one big meal and I want to die for 9 hours.

I have nothing going on this weekend, which I'd like to believe will turn into getting lots of things done around the house, but lets be honest, that probably wont happen. What is likely is that I'll spend the whole weekend in my pajamas watching NCIS and Criminal Minds re-runs, eating ramen noodles for breakfast and cereal for dinner and then freaking out on Sunday night when I remember that no one has any clean matching clothes to wear to school/work on Monday 

Yep, I'm winning at life.


What the Hell...

It's been said that I can't keep a secret to save my blessed life, so why keep trying.

My lack of posting for the last week or so has been due to a recent development that tends to encompass one's entire life.

Here's the thing:
Yes, that is what you think it is, a six week old blob with a heart beat.

In October 2013, new baby ninja will be making it's debut.

I'm hoping for another boy, but Sunshine really wants a girl, so we'll see who gets their wish. I've never said it before but after we are done with this baby, I'm done having babies. I'm 30 and I am ready to be finished with the baby having part of my life.

I am still planning on doing the marathon, but training has been hard while dealing with the exhaustion and morning sickness this time around. I hope things get better, if not Erin (who is rocking the training) will just have to leave me behind and I'll finish on my own, waaaaaaay later.



I may or may not have mentioned that i am training for a half marathon in April. I have 8 weeks to go and have, up to this point, been a little lax in the training.

It's a problem.

So, I found an 8 week training program, it's rather ambitious  but if I can do it, I will hopefully come out at the end ready to roll and kick this 13 miles in the ass. Here's hoping.

The training program is kinda cool, and it starts in earnest next Monday but I'm going to do the weekend runs this weekend, to not break the momentum I've set up.

Monday: Rest

Tuesday: Walk,Run,Walk different distance every week, but a starting with a slower walk, then a short run, then a power walk.

Wednesday: Elliptical! for 45 mintues (b t-dubs, i love the elliptical, hello butt shaping.)

Thursday : Easy Run

Friday: Rest

Saturday: Walk, Run, Walk

Sunday: Long Run, starting at three miles next week and increasing by 1.5 miles each week until the race day.

I'm tired after just typing it, this is gonna be rough.



While perusing the blog roll this morning one of my soul sisters was talking about the challenges of keeping your crap together during the less than awesome times that come along in the journey through mommy-hood.

There are lots of poems and pictures and songs and yada,yada,yada about how awesome parenting is, how sweet your babies skin smells after a bath, how your 5 year old draws pictures filled with hearts and "i love Mommy"s. There are also a few (paper towel and cleaning supply commercials, anyone else think this is ironic) that portray a slightly messier version.

My problem with these commercials, the second batch, is that they allow the commercial mom to freeze time in order to clean up the mess and show her smiling sweetly as she finishes getting the milk, macaroni and cheese and dirty dog water off of every surface in her home. What they never show, and can you blame them, is the reality of the losing battle Mom's wage when trying to clean up a massive mess. Because when "IT" happens, and by "IT" I mean the epic disaster mess of red kool aid, marinara sauce or sharpie, you don't just have the "IT" to deal with.

You also probably have:
1. an absent partner - Jeeves has this uncanny way of never being around when IT happens. He has just run to the store, or is at a movie with his dad, or whatever. He's not there to help with the cleaning or to wrangle the three short people who are in various stages of mental health crisis over my reaction to IT.

2.No time to deal - these things almost never happen when everyone is just relaxing and you totally have the two plus hours its going to take to restore your home. IT happens 15 minutes before church on Easter morning, or right before you have a reunion dinner planned with your girl friends from high school. "What do you mean you flushed an orange peel down the toilet?!?!?"

3. Crying Children - whether the one who caused IT, or the frightened siblings watching the madness unfold from a safe corner, odds are someone is crying. Not quietly, or subtly; but outright snot running, sobbing, heaving, hyperventilating, madness. This, btw, does not help things get cleaned up faster. It also does nothing for your personal mental state as your spine begins to curve and you transform into a terrifying mashup of werewolf and Maeificent from Sleeping Beauty.
Why the eff are YOU crying???

4. Curious Children - if they are not whimpering under the couches, it's a fair bet your kids are wearing their rain boots, holding an umbrella in the middle of the puddle of fruit punch stomping around like they are making wine and saying, "Hey look mommy, red rain!"
I'll show you red rain...

5. Needy Kids - blissfully unaware of the dramatic ballet of cleaning that is required to make a home sanitary after a mid-living room barf fest, one of your tiny people usually decides that you being elbow deep in last night's halfway digested pizza is the perfect time to communicate how hungry she is, and thirsty too, and how she never gets chocolate milk anymore, and how she is just going to die if she doesn't get something to eat and drink right noooowwwwwwwwww. What!?!?!? I'm having a hard time not adding to the puddle of toddler tummy flotsam and she's talking about a hot dog and chocolate milk.

Honey Badger in 3....2....1....

6. Migraine, Morning Sickness, Hangover...........- cause for realz, kids seem to have some sort of evil radar that pings when mommy's barf-o-meter is at 9.5. They pick that time to give the 10 month old a sharpie, or decide that they can pour their own juice, or find your nail polish in the bathroom, or come out of the bedroom saying, "Mommy we love the way your lotion smells, and the floor in the bathroom is so slippery." Yes, thank you, barely hanging on to my breakfast of a half of a pop-tart that my 4 year old didn't eat and a slightly questionable taco, is going to be so much easier while attempting to squeegee up a puddle of Love Spell scented lotion in the bathroom where the babies diapers have been sitting a day longer than they should have.

Life is awesome.

Sometimes it's awesomely great.

Sometimes it sucks, awesomely.


Name Change

I had been calling my little guy Squirt for a long time and in the past few months he has developed a new nickname at home that translated pretty well here too. So without further ado.

God, this kid is cute!

This nickname came about in a general progression of nickname changes, as happens with all of my children.
1. Daniel
2. Danny
3. Danny-dude
4. Danny-doodle
5. Doodle Bug
6. Doodle
Even sick, he's happy!

and now there are all sorts of variations
baby doodle
doodle pants
doodle-y doo
doodle man
Doodle Smiles

The Girls and I built a snowman on Sunday.
Mommy did all the work

and because we live in Missouri, the next day it looked like this...

How the mighty have fallen
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