Wait...I said what?

The life of a mother is never dull, and to illustrate that point, here are some statements that I have actually made recently.

-Where are you underwear? (we were at walmart)

-Why does your brother smell like perfume?

-Cupcakes are not dinner unless you are in college.

-Stop chasing people to put stickers on them.

-Oh god, why are you wet?

-Everyone in church doesn't need to see your underwear (thank god she was wearing them)

-If you don't get your hands out of your sleeves I'm going to cut them off, your hands, not the sleeves.

-You don't get to be the boss until you pay the bills.

-Your sister doesn't need another mom, hush.

-Your brother is not a dog, stop whistling at him.

-Why is your face purple?

-If you make that noise again I'm going to cancel Christmas.

-Dude, you smell.

-Hey, no more underwear jokes until you remember to put them on every morning.

-nope, keep running, you have enough energy to run in my house; you can keep doing laps around the yard.

-the next person who giggles doesn't get to have a birthday next year.

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