Hot Preggo Mess

Alright, let me just start by saying, What the French!?!

The transformation of pregnancy has begun.
And it's not like this. 

I have thus far not posted any pictures of my bump, for very specific reasons.
Shall I explain?

Have you noticed a change in the tide? Yes? That's cause I moved, no joke, I'm so bloated you could probably tap one of my legs and provide enough water for a small village in Africa. My face is really huge, like the kid in that movie with Cher. My rings fit fine one day and make my fingers bleed the next, I can't get enough fluids in me, and they are not flushing the way they should be.

I have pimples, everywhere. On my face, my arms, my legs, my butt, no joke it's like I've been bathing in Lard or something. And my skin is so oily that for the first time, ever, I'm using facial cleansing products. All through high school I'd have A pimple, one, during my period, and that was it. I used soap to wash my face, not any more, I've got enough oil control products on my face I could probably clean up what left of the spill in the gulf. 

Someone must have poured "Mrs. Allen’s World Hair Restorer,” on my eyebrows, they are like caterpillars.  No joke, I've considered going after these things with the weed whacker.

No, my pregnancy is not all gorgeous with muted photos of a tiny baby bump poking out of cute tummy.
This is more on target

It's not often that you find a cartoon that so accurately describes your life however....here you go.



Losing It said...

I'm sure you still look darling!

I hope your face clears up really soon. I can understand the frustration. I turn into sasquatch with all the hair that sprouts from every section of my body.


Julie said...

Oh my dear, I'm sorry it's not great but it will be, just wait after a few months everything will clear up and your body will love being PG.
Take care and have a blessed week.

Ana said...

Oh sweetie, I can so sympathize with the pimples on your butt. I don't normally get zits on my face during my period...but I get them on my a$$. Oh they hurt!

Just wait until you're farther into this trimester, you'll be feeling better! Your body has already carried two little ninjas, so number three is going to be throwing you for a loop, trying to be one step ahead of you, doing everything different from Ninja Babes #1 and #2.


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