So I've been told on numerous occasions not to pray for patience, because when you do God gives you reasons to be patient. My ability to deal with the little annoyances in my life has been greatly diminshed by...well, I'm really not sure. Honestly I don't remember when my fuse got so short. But I'm super irritated most of the time, especially by the constant nattering, giggling, yelling and fighting of my two little munches.
It's gotten to the point the Jeeves told me last night that my face and voice were mean.
That knocked me back a bit, I'm mean?
Not okay, something has got to change.
I don't want to be that angry mother that people glare at in stores. I've seen that lady in the store, I don't want to be her. I want my children to know that I love them and love being with them. I need some help, but I'm not praying for patience, I'm praying for better coping skills, and to be more mindful of my interactions with my children. Also being the person I am, I have a plan.
I honestly don't believe my kids are trying to drive me crazy. I think that they would be much more chill when we are confined to the house if they were out doing other things more often, so we are going to be going out much more. There are tons of free places where I can turn them loose and let them run out all that excess energy. Booger is old enough now that I wouldn't have to follow them around, I could sit on a park bench and practice some deep breathing.
Also, they both love to do workout videos with me, so I in spite of the fact that I work out at the gym more often than not, we are going to be doing some exercises at home. I bet there is a kid based dance workout vid somewhere out there, I'm gonna find it and buy it.
Has anyone else ever felt this way, had this pervasive sense of irritation directed at the world at large for no definable reason?